Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Save the! --eh, We're Over It.

What ever happened to 'save the rainforests??' Al Gore, are you out there? When I was a little lad, it was like doomsday if the rainforests were ever cut down. If the rainforests were destroyed, we would not only increase the CO2 in our atmosphere and turn the heat way up in our Earth, but we would lose hundreds of thousands of precious, precious endangered species in the process. Some of which we've never even seen before! Or so I was told...

But what happened? Were they 'saved?' I doubt it... How did the drama end? What's going on there? I want to know!

When I was in grade school, it was like we were being indoctrinated with pro-rainforest propaganda! I swear, we had pictures of them posted, we were tested on them, I'm sure we had some sort of Rainforest Day to celebrate their crucial nature and the beautiful wonders that they contain. Hell, I know from grade school that the rainforest has layers; the top is the canopy and that's where all the birds lived and stuff, and at the bottom is really dark because the trees are that tall!

We had movies telling us the importance of the rainforests! Helloo, FernGully anyone?? If I remember correctly, that bulldozer monster was terrifying! And if there was no bulldozer monster in FernGully, then it was from another rainforest movie, which further validates my point. The 90s were saturated with Rainforest promotions.

One would think that now, when 'green' is a catchphrase and corporations are bragging about their environmental standards and we each seem to matter-of-factly know the science of how global warming works, that we would at least have some update on how our South American world wonders are doing.

It's honestly like the World Wildlife Fund or Greenpeace or whomever were like, "Ah, fuck it. The only people interested in rainforests are little kids. Once they grow up they lose interest; we all saw it coming. Let's start talking about recycling instead." Does anyone care to fill me in? If this crucial drama of our planet in peril was so incredibly important, why do I not know how the story panned out? Don't we care? Was it that important? It had to be! What happened to the rainforests?? Like the number of licks in a Tootsie-Pop, the world may never know...

1 comment:

Unknown said...

And the hard rock cafe had the vanishing rainforest numbers scrolling under its sign, along with population numbers or something else. You're too young to realize this happens all the time. Also, what happened to Michael Keaton? I miss him. Is he too pure for Hollywood? He was Batman!